Embracing Your True Self: The Journey from Pretending to Healing

In the quiet moments of self-reflection, it's not uncommon to feel a sense of disconnection—a whispering thought that somehow, you just don't fit in. If this resonates with you, know that you're seen, heard, and deeply felt.

There wasn't a specific day I can pinpoint when the feeling of not belonging crept into my life. It was more like a shadow, subtle and persistent, a part of me that felt awkward, out of place, and pained. Over time, I realized that parts of me had been sculpted, almost meticulously, to mask this discomfort, to shield the raw edges of not fitting in.

I remember trying to find solace in my career, believing that my identity was intertwined with my job. It was a distraction, a way to numb the pain of feeling like an outsider. Similarly, the fleeting satisfaction of receiving attention or approval—like the dopamine surge from a "hot guy" showing interest—was merely a band-aid over a much deeper wound: the nagging fear that I wasn't enough just as I am.

This revelation highlighted the importance of healing from the inside out. It's a journey of understanding that many aspects of what we consider our identity are actually constructs, developed over time to protect ourselves from pain. These facets of our persona, from the interests we claim to have to the relationships we engage in, often serve as armor rather than expressions of our true selves.

For example, pretending to be a fan of the Broncos because someone we admire supports them, or convincing ourselves we can manage a casual relationship when, in reality, it leaves us feeling empty and hurt, are manifestations of our deeper insecurities. These patterns are cries for attention and care from the parts of ourselves longing to be acknowledged and healed.

Recognizing our patterns for what they are—mechanisms of protection rather than inherent traits—is a powerful step towards self-love and healing. Instead of harboring resentment towards these aspects of ourselves, we can choose to view them with compassion and understanding.

Healing is not about erasing parts of ourselves but about integrating them with love and acceptance. It's about becoming the "Magnetic Woman" you were always meant to be—someone who attracts love, joy, and fulfillment by being authentically you.

So, to the queens out there feeling lost or out of place, remember: your patterns do not define you. They are simply parts of you that are begging for love and healing. Today, try looking at yourself with love. See your protective mechanisms for what they are, and choose to embrace them with kindness.

Heal, queen, and step into the magnetic, authentic version of yourself that the world is waiting to see.

❤️Lil

P.S. Take the Feminine Dating Archetype Quiz on my page to reveal your blocks to love and find your true love match.