What is a Polyvagal-Informed Approach to dating?
What is a Polyvagal-Informed Approach to Dating?
The acknowledgment, deep reverence, & understanding of your Nervous System when it comes to the dating process.
One of my teachers, Mastin Kipp, once said, “Story follow state.”
Basically what that means is, is the anxiety, overwhelm, depression, anger, frustration, withdrawal, & overthinking that accompany your dating process makes a lot of sense.
So the state of your nervous system (the automatic responses that you can’t control with your mind, meditation, or breathwork) actually INFORM stories you tell yourself.
Like these:
“I will never attract an emotionally available man.”
“I’m too broken to have love.”
“Dating sucks.”
“Having love is too much hard work.”
“I have to sleep with them to stay connected.”
And so so so many more.
Why a Polyvagal-Informed Approach to Dating?
At this point in the game, you’ve heard of fight, flight, or freeze.
Here’s the problem, just knowing about whether you’re in fight, flight, or freeze without understanding the wisdom that these reactions contain is basically like reading the cover of a book without diving into the deep knowledge you would gain from actually reading it.
I hear a lot, “I’m frozen.”
Or, “I have anxiety.”
Or, “I’m overwhelmed.”
Which is great knowledge!
AND, the next level is to understand, at a deep & profound level, the WHY & the HOW these reactions are surfacing in your dating experience.
So, instead of wanting it to go away, you can start to make friends with these reactions & realize that they actually make A TON of sense.
What a Polyvagal-Informed Approach to dating IS NOT?
A label, a book, or a podcast.
While Attachment Styles, Abandonment Wounds, Shadow Work, Mother Wounds, Inner Child Work, Father Wounds, etc, are all great.
The label without consistent action & support equals stagnation, aka no change, & a sad (or non-existent) dating life.
How do you know if a Polyvagal-Informed Approach is right for you?
If you have seen a pattern in dating 3+ times, even something like anxiety & overwhelm.
Who benefits from this approach?
Women who are willing to step into courageous action for the true love they desire.
In the containers I hold, we work on rewiring your Dating Nervous System & priming it for epic love.
In big love,
❤️Lilli
P.S. Take the Feminine Dating Archetype Quiz to reveal your blocks to love & find your true love match.
P.P.S. I’m so grateful that I get to coach successful women who have already done a lot of work and peel back the last layer of healing so they can finally welcome in epic love. Message me here.
